Sunday, December 18, 2005

Digital Cowboy Is Sadly Mistaken

Alright folks, this could get ugly so sit back and enjoy the ride.

During the previews to another movie I saw the other day, a trailer started out with a police helicopter emblazoned with Miami-Dade on the side. I got a knot in my stomach, a sense of dread. Jamie Foxx appears briefly on the screen, fades away and when the picture fades back in, he's standing with Colin Farrell on the roof of a building. Just then, I knew what I was looking at. My worst fears were confirmed.

MIAMI VICE - THE MOVIE

I instantly thought of Digital Cowboy because he informed me in a previous conversation that he practically idolized Sonny Crockett during his obviously misspent youth.

Today I asked him if he had heard the horrible truth. He had. With his keen sense of the obvious, he sensed that I was not as pleased about this waste of celluloid as he was. "What's wrong with Miami Vice?!" he screeched. It was really more of a statement than a question.

"Miami Vice is Gay," I replied in disgust. "It was a stupid, gay TV show and it's going to be a stupider and gayer movie!"

Apparently Digital Cowboy, who appears not to have made the cut for The Village People, called in to question my sexual predilections and my ability to metabolize alcohol at a rapid rate. Being only a digital cowboy, I personally think he's probably just got pixel envy.

In his post, he goes on to extol the virtues of the fine weaponry and automotive machines put on display during the run of the original MIAMI VICE television show. In his post, DC said:

...the directing on that show made sure that we often got a chance to look directly down the very large barrel of his Smith & Wesson.

So there you have it folks, Digital Cowboy enjoys the view of Don Johnson's barrel. So who's gay?

Update:

God's judgement is upon the city of Miami because of this movie being made. This article gives details of a plane crash in which 19 died. The end of the article states that the small airline to which the crashed aircraft belonged frequently had planes on MIAMI VICE.