Friday, March 30, 2007

Dispelling A False Notion

Apparently Res and Farmer Tom (and his Mrs.) think I look like the poor farting shlub in the post below (see the comments).

If you haven't already, scroll down and see the picture of Stewart and then look at the my pictures. There is NO resemblance other than we're both white males in our 30's with blue eyes. I know, I probably seem a bit overly defensive but it's all in good fun.

And thank you Taylor for standing by me on that one!

Monday, March 26, 2007

How Is This Not Funny?

Stewart Laidlaw who will cringe for the rest of his life every time he does a Google search to see what his name turns up, was barred from a pub in Scotland for farting too much. Apparently since the smoking ban in Scotland took effect, people in the pub were noticing that this guy was stinking up the place; clearing rooms. No one noticed it before or at least no one was able to pin it on him.

Says Laidlaw, "I never used to complain about the smell of their cigarette smoke, but now everyone complains about me. It's just a natural thing. What can I do about it? I must be the first person in the country to get banned from a pub for passing wind. But it's not a title I want. I certainly don't see it as funny."

Come on! How is that NOT funny? He got kicked out of a bar for farting! Stewart! Dude! Capitalize on this. Bottle your scent and sell it as a novelty or something. That picture of you is perfect for the label; it looks like you're letting out a stinker. Write a book on flatulence, you'll make some good money. Then take that money and move to another country and change your name where you will not be recognized for being "the smelly guy who got kicked out of the pub."

Let's all raise a glass cheek to Stewart Laidlaw and his odoriferous orifice!

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Ultrasound Before Abortion

This is a great idea! South Carolina is considering a law that would require women who want to have an abortion to have an ultrasound before the abortion. This is the best idea I've heard yet on the discussion of abortion.

Those who support abortion (notice I didn't say "support choice") are rightfully concerned. They know that there will be far fewer abortions if this law is passed because women will see their "baby" and decide that it's really a baby and not just a fetal blob distorting their abdominal section. A pro-abortion law maker registers her opinion. Rep. Gilda Cobb (D) says, "I see it as some kind of emotional blackmail, and I think we're putting an undue burden on our healthcare providers and on folk who are providing those services."

Can there be any doubt that these people are pro-abortion and not just pro-choice? Oh, but they don't want women to feel bad about killing their babies. And it really is all about how this will make women feel. It doesn't impose any restrictions on the abortion itself so why should a truly pro-choice person be opposed to this law?

Abortion was supposed to be something that was rare and made with much serious consideration. Now we abort 46 million babies a year in this country. Abortion has become a convenience that is not taken seriously. Women have been told that a fetus is not really a baby and therefore disposable. How we define 'personhood' still seems to be up for debate but how is it that a fetus is not a person 5 minutes before it's born but it is person 5 minutes later?

Requiring an ultrasound is a great step to showing women that when they get an abortion, they're not having a tumor removed. If they want to make the law fair and require an ultrasound before having anything removed from the body, I'm all for it. You don't have grief counseling for people that have had a kidney or a cyst or a tumor removed.

I hope the idea of this law catches the attention of lawmakers in other states and we see it spreading like wildfire. I have a hard time believing that it could be found unconstitutional.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Happy Birthday To My Blog

My blog is 2 years old today! I've made 387 posts in the last two years.

I added my site meter after my blog was up for a couple of weeks. (you can find my site meter at the very bottom of this page) My daily average right now is 44. Only a few weeks ago it was 70. The average is based on the last 7 days of activity. It goes up and down. Only a couple of months ago, my average was in the 30's. I've had nearly 40,000 visitors.

As soon as I get a little time I'm going to add a "Best Of" section on the right. There seem to be a few posts in particular that I end up sending links to frequently.

Hopefully in the next few months I'll be moving my entire blog to a new site with a complete redesign.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

I'm Sure He Knows Something I Don't


Stephen Hawking lectured to a sold out crowd in Berkeley and said the universe spontaneously came in to existence from nothing.

“If one believed that the universe had a beginning, the obvious question was, what happened before the beginning,” Hawking said. “What was God doing before He made the world? Was He preparing hell for people who asked such questions?”
It appears the good doctor doesn't realize that he's contradicting himself by speaking of eternity and a linear time line in the same context.

Just in case you didn't know, time is a physical property affected by mass, acceleration and gravity. Since it is physical, it is subject to entropy, etc. So what was there BEFORE the physical realm started? Nothing. But God didn't sit around for a LONG TIME before that because time simply did not exist. Even now, God is not constrained by time, he is outside of it. I suppose it's much like being in orbit around the Earth and being able to see Florida and California at the same time. He sees what we call past and future from outside the bounds of that linear path.

Matter cannot materialize out of nothing. Everything comes from something. The 2nd(thanks for the correction Giraffe) 1st Law of Thermodynamics says that "matter can neither be created nor destroyed." Presumably, matter cannot be created by other matter; obviously it can be made by God since He exists outside of the physical world.

It's useless to talk about eternity in terms of it being "a long time" because there is no time involved at all. That's a tough concept to wrap your brain around because we only think in terms of past, present and future.

I theorize that because we pass out of the physical realm when we die that we all arrive at the judgment seat simultaneously. I nearly said "at the same time" but that obviously wouldn't be accurate. Think of two rockets taking off from each coast and meeting a space station. One coast represents the past, the other the future. Think of passing out of the atmosphere as going beyond the physical realm.

Even the highly intelligent and knowledgeable will stretch the bounds of credulity in order to avoid coming to the obvious conclusion that we had to have been created.

Thursday, March 08, 2007

A Serious Drink

I guess my friend was having a crazy day. In her email she said, "I need a drink, a serious drink."

My response:

Drink: Tanya, we need to talk, have a seat. We've been together a long time now and it's time you took our relationship more seriously. I'm really tired of this casual drinking, I want a commitment.

Tanya: I'm sorry Drink, I just don't think I can commit to something like that right now. I've got 3 kids living here and this new house to take care of. I love you and I'm glad we can have some time together but I just don't think I can do anymore than that, it wouldn't be fair to the kids.

Drink: But Tanya, look at all of the good times we've had together! I'm probably responsible for at least one of your children being born, doesn't that mean anything to you?

Tanya: I hear what you're saying Drink and we have had a lot of good times. They are some of the best times I can never remember but I've got a lot of responsibilities now and I am trying to get my Real Estate license too. I simply don't have the time. Don't get me wrong Drink, I really appreciate you but you've always known the kind of relationship we've had; I've never led you on. And hey, I know you love the occasional mid week quickie. Yeah, look at that smile. But seriously Drink, if we can't keep it casual I'm going to have to say goodbye.

Drink: I suppose you're right Tanya, but I guess I had to try. I'll always be here for you.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Tick Tock

Daylight savings time starts this Sunday at 2:00 AM.

You probably already know that already but what you might not know is that this will affect some of your electronics. Namely, it will affect your computers. With Windows XP for example, if you do not have auto updates turned out, you probably have not got the DST patch necessary and your clock will not change accordingly.

If you are using Windows 2000 Professional or Server, the clock also will not change without a VERY expensive patch issued by Microsoft.

Here is the low tech solution to your problem. Double click your clock on the bottom right of your screen. Click the Time Zone tab and then un-check the box marked "Automatically Adjust Clock For Daylight Saving Changes".

Now here's the important part*********** Before you go to bed Saturday night, MANUALLY adjust the time on your computer ahead one hour.

See? Now who says my blog isn't actually helpful?

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

A Few Blogs Of Note

Here are a few blogs I'd like you folks to check out.

First up is my friend World Wide Nelly. Nelly is a friend of mine from Culiacan, Mexico. She is an intelligent, articulate woman (and yes guys, she's cute too). She just started posting and hopefully we can encourage her to post some more. She's a native Spanish speaker but decided to publish her blog in English. Pay close attention to her second post about rich Mexican people; it's an amusing perspective on the Mexican economy from South Of The Border.

Next up is Yet Another Ruminator. You all may be very familiar with his frequent comments over at Vox's blog where he posts as IBreakCellPhones. He finally decided to start blogging.

Last, but certainly not least of the new bloggers is Luke's Bunker. Apparently Luke has been reading here for a while and making occasional comments. Apparently he didn't find my blog fulfilling enough so he had to go and start his own. ~just messing with you Luke...

These two hardly need any introduction, they've been around a little while already but I never made an announcement. Farmer Tom has a blog that is outfitted like a Case International Harvester John Deere tractor. Our other well known blogger is the lovely and talented Taylor. You have seen both of them at Vox's as well.

Luke was also kind enough to point me to two other worthy blogs:

Pro Libertate is written by an ex staffer of the John Birch Society for being rather harsh on Jorge Bush in his personal blog written in his personal time. The powers that be decided that he was too much of a dissident and had to be expelled from their ranks. In some small way, this makes him a hero.

The War On Guns appears to be quite an informative look at the stock market. No, that's not right, an informative look at .... never mind, you probably already figured it out.

I will be adding these blogs to my Blog Roll soon. If you are not on my Blog Roll, please post your blog name and link in my comments and I should most happily add you on my next update.

Monday, March 05, 2007

Another Useless Republican

I know what you're thinking, they're all useless now.

New York Mayor, Michael Bloomberg was a bit vague in his answer when asked if he's going to run for President.

He's a liberal; worse than McCain even. I may have to revise my prediction that McCain will end up as Hillary's VP. If Bloomberg ends up making a good showing in the primaries (even though he won't win), he just might end up as Hillary's VP.

It only makes sense for her to choose a liberal Republican for that slot. It will appear to be bipartisan.

We're all in deep trouble.

Saturday, March 03, 2007

A Fireside Chat

Ed: Hey Jimmy, throw a few more fags on the fire and don't be niggardly about it. I'm just going to sit here and masticate a hot dog for a while; it's probably going to cause an eruction.

Jimmy: Sure Ed, whatever you say. Oh, did you hear about Brenda? Frank told me she's got acute angina. I'm going to drop by and see her later; I hear she likes to formicate.

Ed: Good luck with that Jimmy. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, but Brenda's brother is pedagog; I guess it runs in the family.

Jimmy: I've really enjoyed this stimulating oral intercourse Ed, but I've got to get some work done before I go see Brenda.

Friday, March 02, 2007

Life With Hillary

I was thinking this morning about what life in Amerika will be like with Hillary at the Helm.

First of all, no one in mainstream America is going to call her President Clinton (or President Rodham if she chooses). We're not even going to call her President Hillary. We're simply going to refer to her as Hillary (or one of her various disparaging nicknames). Of course the media will refer to her as President Clinton because they have to but the rest of us will not accord her the respect of that office enough to refer to her by title most of time.

When Bill Clinton took office, one of the things Hillary did, as you might recall is clear out the Whitehouse Travel Office. She didn't just fire these people, she had them brought up on criminal charges. If I recall correctly, the jury took less than 30 minutes to bring back a verdict of "Not Guilty". What is she going to do when she actually holds the office herself. Bush (stupidly) took on a New Tone and left lots of Clinton appointees in office when he took the helm. Lizard Queen is going to clean house.

The Patriot Act is going to be her personal weapon to silence criticism. Isn't it obvious that anyone that opposes her is a terrorist sympathizer? If it isn't obvious now, it will be.

Watch for her to put Al Gore in charge of the EPA. This will accomplish two things for her. First, it will put Gore under her thumb and in a place she can keep an eye on him. Secondly it will be her way of telling him that she is better than he is because she is President and he didn't make it. He will be too stupid to understand this.

Hold on to your checkbooks folks, the tax collectors will be dancing in the streets. We will have higher taxes, especially if the Dems continue to hold both Houses. The reason they'll say we have to have higher taxes, especially on the rich (i.e. the people who produce) is to pay the country back for the cost of The War.

You thought Bush's "Guest Worker Plan" was bad? Just wait to see what Hillary does (or rather doesn't) do on immigration. She will want to streamline the path to citizenship for these people so they can all vote Democrat in a few years.

Look for Hillary to worship at the alter of the European Union and the United Nations.

Oh, and I can't wait to see what she's going to have Bill doing for her. This is going to get interesting.

What are your predictions for what will prove to be a dark time in our country's history?